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Today's advertising world is a varied and expanding universe of incredible opportunities, and the Internet has expanded the ways for creative people to make a living by constructing all kinds of content over a variety of outlets. This is great news if you're smart, you can ditch your job as a professional football player, nurse, astronaut, dictator or influencer or even thought-leader and just lie around the house all day in a torn-up tee shirt and underwear, watching Sponge Bob reruns, while creating an enormous income. Well, we decided to give this Internet content stuff a try, or maybe something better or not.  The goal was, the hell with advertising, it's digital content that is pertinent.   Many think that advertising is a particular kind of content, at least some times, but no one wants to admit it, it messes up obtuse 600-word job descriptions. Anyway, time marches backward, a commitment to content was etched in digital stone, by me. If the content sells something, then it would be proof that advertising is no longer viable.  Then, on a dark and stormy night, I went to buy a tee-shirt and saw my fortune, in a window, on a mannequin. And my fortune wasn't digital. I saw a Baltimore Ravens jersey with the name Jackson on the back, along with a Ravens logo, an NFL logo, and a Nike logo. I quickly used my steel trap math brain and my almost encyclopedic knowledge of out of home advertising and immediately ditched the idiotic digital world, where you are called on to do something like writing a column for Dachshund loving Ohio State/Cleveland Browns fans.  Back to my brain, I figured, based on studies I have memorized, that if 100 people each wore a promotional tee shirt/jersey/shirt, etc. 17 times during one year, the tee shirts would gather 100,00 impressions. So, I figured if I wear my jersey 17 times in the upcoming year while wandering around my Manhattan neighborhood looking for stuff that people throw out*, that would be 10,000 impressions. I quickly came up with a price for my media plan right on the spot where I stood admiring the Lamar Jackson jersey. I figured millions of grown-up adults, who can't play football or other sports, would want to wear a 22-year-old kid's replica until he did something to displease them. At that point, they would stop insulting each other's political parties, and go to social media war against a gifted and personable young man with a gift they don't have. So, I figured my money-making opportunity would disappear fast. I would also have to diversify. I'd add Aaron Judge and any NBA player not in rehab, to my money-making roster.  I did another quick study and figured that in 2018, (2019 is not over) advertisers spent, on average (on the ridiculous Internet) *$2.80 per thousand impressions (CPM) and $0.75 per click *(CPC). And, the average click-through rate (CTR) Click Through Rate on the GDN (Google Display Network) was 0.35%. So long suckers in the digital universe. I'm walking the streets. After parsing all the data, I decided I would wear the shirt 34 times a year and charge only $2.70 per 1,000 impressions (great savings to Nike, the NFL, the Ravens, and Lamar). Unlike using the Internet, I would be in charge of my impressions. I decided to leave my neighborhood, (no one in NYC (Manhattan) does that without good reason) and take advantage of the millions of people in my city. I would just run up to them and make an impression. The Internet was on its way to hell, where it belongs. I was ready to start my new career of just walking around with people's names on my back.  I acted and went into the store after a nice salesperson opened the door for me.   I said, "Thank you.   He said, " No problem."   I said," I'm glad it was no problem. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself after causing you adversity."   Anyway, I swooped into action and asked him for the Lamar Jackson jersey. He retrieved one for me.   I said, "Thanks."   He said, "No worries."   I said, "Good, I was worried about your safety while handing me the jersey."   Then, I said, "I'll take it."   He said, " Thanks, great, you'll like it. It's about number one in jersey sales. "   I said, " No worries. How much?"   He said,"$100.00. "   I said, "Per impression?" (What suckers. Bollocks to the Internet. This guy and Lamar and the Ravens and the NFL get it. You got to pay to play. Next, Aaron Judge.  He said, "Impression?"  I said, "Yes. I thought it was a bit high, and I don't want to take advantage." (Oh sure "true dat").   He said, " No, that's the cost, sorry."  I said, "Fine if you guys can afford it, I'm down."  He said, "Cool, do you want to pay credit card or cash, no checks?"  I said, "Pay for what?"  He said, "The official NFL, Baltimore Ravens, Lamar Jackson, Nike, replica jersey specifically designed to make people think they're a 22-year-old NFL star wearing his jersey in the street walking around common people.    I said, "No, sorry you're young and don't understand advertising and out of home vs digital content." I patiently went over impressions, pay per click CTR, GDN, CPM and, how I'm doing better for Nike, the NFL, the Baltimore Ravens, and Lamar than the Internet could. "Cant' you see how, stoopid phat crazy, phresh this is said I?" He said, "Get out."   I said, " I'm not sure I understand. I'm going to wear a piece of clothing that promotes four brands, and you want me to pay for it?  I've never heard of such a thing.   He said, "Dude, please. "  I said, would you mind helping take that easy chair out on the curb up to my apartment. No one's home, I can sneak it in.  He said, " Yo, *****Swerve."    Do you know that people are paying:  $78.00, during the autumn sale, for a Michael Kors -sequined logo-cotton jersey T-Shirt - (women's). It says, "MK"     $148, during the autumn sale, for a Michael Kors (men’s) Cotton-Blend Zip-Up Hoodie (no sequins) it says KORS.  $100.00 for a Nike, Lamar Jackson jersey, with a Nike Swoosh, NFL logo, and a Baltimore Ravens Logo. On the back, it says, Jackson. Lamar Jackson is a superior athlete you are not, Lamar is 22, you are probably not, 22. This is a huge problem, don't you think? You're 100, and wearing a child's jersey. NCAA athletes don't get a dime for their images and names. Take it off or at least, buy a generic.  $149.00 for a Nike New England Football Jersey - No name, but it does have a Nike swoosh and NFL logo. It also says New England Patriots on it. The New England Patriots have won 6 Super Bowls. You probably haven't won a Super Bowl. If you have won a Super Bowl with the New England Patriots or any other NFL team, you should be getting jerseys for free along with the debilitating and ongoing physical and mental problems you have earned. $3,850.00 for a Louis Vuitton mini soft trunk.  It is a stupid little bag with nothing on it but initials. But wait, it's not that bad. I went to the website. I see why it's so expensive. Louis Vuitton's website offers complimentary shopping. You don't have to pay to shop. Louis Vuitton must be taking a beating offering complimentary shopping.  

$89-$150 for a Ralph Lauren (Polo logo) shirt (hard cost $3.15). Wear yours into Dylan's Candy Bar and pay $100 for a designer Clark Bar. So, I'm going back to work. Most of my work ends up on the Internet, where there is an overwhelming amount of honesty. The rest of you, among other things, are probably not great athletes. You're not going to get better looking wearing over-priced, you're going to have more sex, and you're not going to have a better life. Perform a "logotomy" on yourself and wear something without a meaningless logo, or child's name on it. Give some of the money, you save, to a good cause. Doing something good will make you better looking to yourself. You'll have a better life, and the people you help will have a better life, then buy a white tee shirt and put your own name on the back. *      I found a couch once it was cool. I wasn't allowed to bring it in. I would guess the reason had something to do with it not having a logo. **     CPM(cost per mille) which in our example means an advertiser must pay $2.80 for every 1,000 impressions of its ad. ***     Cost Per Click (CPC) refers to the actual price you pay for each click in your pay-per-click (PPC) marketing campaigns. ****    I figured, I would just run up to people and shove my shirt at them. This would create a robust but reimagined click-through rate that           would smash the puny 0.35% in its stupid digital face.  *****   Get out. 

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  • Brian Keller

Advertising and marketing have expanded enormously over the years due to the exponential growth of the digital audience. That’s great, but the audience is fractured and is providing a challenge for clients and the practitioners of advertising and marketing. The interesting news is behavior change messaging has become, in the last 10 years a popular tool. Humans are not the most rational of creatures. Surprising isn’t it? When it comes to changing behavior, we have to also understand that people generally like what they have now. They may not want to invest in something that pays off later, whether that is emotionally or monetarily. We would rather not lose now than win later. Let’s look at two scenarios, target the behavior, and create a message. Know it’s going to take patience.

Seniors are increasingly interesting. At this point, many people are wealthier, healthier and better educated than ever before. Many of this group is of the Woodstock generation, and many are surprised that they are actually aging and could benefit from a number of small changes. Advertisers are also dealing with the children of aging parents who are either influential or are the decision-makers. A number of months ago we took an assignment that dealt with increasing the population of a client’s adult daycare centers. Its target hasn’t always embraced adult daycare, a great idea. It’s viewed as stodgy and “old” and not invigorating. Many complained of being warehoused. Patience. We wanted to change the behavior and realized quickly that our hoped-for constituency would not accept preaching or pushing. Patience. We interviewed a number of people who attended adult daycare and found them to be vibrant, engaged and thoroughly happy with their time spent. There was no stigma, no ageism just fun. With the emotion, we took from our interviews we created a program that tied together with the diverse offerings with the end result and left just a bit of an upbeat message. We also knew that it would take a while to affect a change but the digital space gave us time and plenty of “free” media placements (web, social) that also aided the SEO of the client’s site(s) across the board. We called our effort "Don’t Postpone Joy", a simple call to people to go have fun.

Data drives our second execution. Here we go, Millenials.

We can’t stay too far away from a mention of this group. Millennials are a group of people who are very susceptible to binge drink. We know that a change of behavior won’t come with preaching. We created a 360 campaign. We know many “party” and see no reason to stop (they don’t want to lose now and win later), and would have no interest in an investment. Being lovers of data, we decided that we’d change our behavior as advertisers and just let the facts play out

What we told them: Drinking increases your chances of having sex.

What we told them: The National Violence Resource Center reports that 72% rapes occurred while the victims were intoxicated.

“What else did you tell them?”

“Nothing,” the data spoke, the media was prevalent. Patience paid off.

Next time more on behavioral change economics and a whole bunch on agile marketing (for those without lots of patience).

Call us up at the Chromavision Brand Lab (212-686-7366) or email us at and/or visit the rest our website

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One day Sheri of AT&T said: Hey, we have a website get me a piece of paper. Hey Amber Leigh, look at this. “Hey, signals or data expressed as series of the digits 0 and 1, typically represented by values of a physical quantity such as voltage or magnetic polarization are digital. Get me those clowns at our agency, and let’s do a banner ad. (Her Assistant) Amber Leigh:

Sheri of AT&T: Who cares, but I'm not paying 15% media commission on it. "How Sweet it is." I’ve just changed advertising forever.   No one will escape it.  And, consumers will put the bulls eyes on their backs. Soon all advertising will be a direct response, up close and personal. It will be, One nation (then the world), under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice and individual targeted irresistible offer for all... Amber Leigh: And Justice for all, Metallica! We're not  safe from Direct now I don't want a Pocket Fisherman.” Sheri of AT&T:  Of course Metallica. “Ah, but they are safe. You’re talking old school. You go to the mail you see that envelope, you see the Johnson Box, and you trash it. You see a pocket fisherman ad turn it off, done. But, now I seea web, a worldwide web of ads, no one will be able to escape. Because no matter where they go, we will follow. And, we will be able to follow because they won't turn off, they won't drop out, they'll be tuned in, 24/7.  We’ll be trolling for them, with the digital bait, we've just invented. Trolling, an interesting word.” Amber Leigh: What are you talking about, already? Digital bait? You're crazy with yourself. You need a good Rolfing. Sheri of the Digital Space: Amber Leigh, I’ve seen the future, and it’s not talking on the phone, kiss me goodbye AT&T I’m going to follow the light. One day, there will be a universal digital meeting place. Maybe there will be multiple places.  People will gather around the digital fireplace to scream about politics and take pictures of their food. And, there’s room for expansion of these platforms. I see a place where you can go meet people and see how they may benefit their own professional lives. I see it based on “Small world experiment” the study of network theory by Stanley Milgram. People will be professionally hooking up, “Six Degrees of Separation” style.  All will look for symbiotic relationships, and all will have trumped up job-titles which will be used to advance their careers. Everyone will be impressive. And, all will not care too much about anything as long as they get theirs. This will be free, but to join they will give me/us/others of our ilk their personal information just so they can receive some kind of electronic applause for their largely lame pontifications and explorations. My prediction is, soon people will look to this arena for news.   We’ll buy and sell that information and use it to follow them and target messages to them. People eventually will not be safe from what I’ll call data mining, analytics, and Artificial Intelligence. We will be with them everywhere they go. By the time they wake up, it will be too late.  Amber Leigh: “Then What, Sheri?” Sheri of the Digital Space: “Then it don’ matter. Then I’ll be all aroun’ in the dark. I’ll be ever’ where — wherever you look.”  "We're going to be digital Tom Joads.  Mark that up agencies, Fuggedaboutit. "

One day not that long ago, after that conversation, in 1994, AT&T ran the first banner ad. The ad was a call out on a web page driving people to click.  Two years later, Yahoo! launched search ads, and in 1997, pop-up ads started to pop up, then keyword auctions and Google AdWords, apps, social ads, and more, more, more. Much of the demographic information was and continues to be, mined from cat picture posters, food picture takers, dangerous location selfie posters, regular selfie posters, political posters, grandkid picture posters, and the like. Billions of people are giving away information on exactly what they like, hate, buy, hate to buy, have to buy, and where to buy, who they vote for, who they don’t vote for, and the beat goes on. Then one day someone said, “Hey, I just put up a picture of my Denny’s Grand slam on Facebook. Then I got an email from Denny’s, and then I got an ad in my newsfeed from Denny’s, and then I got a message from Waffle House. How cool is that? They know right where I am. And then one day someone said: “ Facebook has changed their privacy rules. They’re using our information and our pictures.  That like totally blows. Like, I’ll fix it.” Then in 2012, this nitwit posted: “Don’t forget tomorrow starts the new Facebook rule where they can use your photo don’t forget Deadline tomorrow!!! Everything you’ve ever posted becomes public from tomorrow. Even messages that have been deleted or the photos not allowed. It costs nothing for a simple copy and paste, better safe than sorry. …. I do not give Facebook or any entities associated with Facebook permission to use my pictures, information, messages or posts, both past, and future. …. The violation of privacy can be punished by law (UCC 1-308- 1 1 308-103 and the Rome Statute). …All members must post a note like this. If you do not publish a statement at least once it will be tacitly allowing the use of your photos, as well as the information contained in the profile status updates."  It has not been a Facebook killer, it doesn't work, and it’s made the rounds in 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019 as well. Why are the people getting mad? Didn’t anyone realize that when something is free, it’s not? Every time you get an app, join a group, fill out a form etcetera your information wallet is open. NOTE: On August15, 2019,UCC 1-308- 1 1 308-103 and the Rome Statute (look it up) was circulating on Facebook again.  What you see in digital, what you see on the web, what you see in your apps is advertising directly to you. What you're beginning to see in your smart appliances is ad content generators and behavior, prediction facilitators. The world is direct response. Average adults spend more than 2 1/2 hours on Social Media every day. The average amount of time in the "digital space" (American adults) is roughly 11 hours daily (including social media). The digital ad spend will be  $333.25 billion and digital will account for roughly half of the global ad market. It expected to go to $523 billion in the next two years. (there are conflicting reports on the spend but there are different variables used to determine the spend.)   Progressive just keeps rolling along, why? Divorce will touch 50% of the children in the United States. Half of those children will see the breakup of a second marriage. Children of divorced parents are more susceptible to injury, asthma, headaches, and speech impediments, and are fifty percent more likely to develop health problems. And studies (beginning in the early ’80s) have illustrated that Teenagers of divorced parents and blended families are more likely to need psychological help (300%). Stop Jamie - Step Jamie We assume that Progressive doesn’t realize this, and the other facts about divorce. They keep running an abysmal commercial that makes light of a new man being introduced into the lives of two teenage boys. Someone felt that bundling insurance messaging needs something vile to be played as a comedy. Someone felt that the line “You’re not my dad” is funny. Progressive, long the home of Flo has sunk further by using her ancillary posse members as stand-alone. Too bad you can’t say “unbelievable”, because it’s not anymore.

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